Breathe
by AWinterTypeOfGuy
Summary: It seemed that one day Puck was throwing Kurt into the dumpsters, the next they were walking into the school hand-in-hand. Everyone expected the drastic change to die out as quickly as it started but, to much surprise, it didn't. Not until their one year anniversary. Inspired by the song "Breathe" by Taylor Swift. M to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer- I do not own Glee or any songs mentioned. **

**This is my first fan fic, so please bare with me. I'm actually a guy, not a girl, which might come as surprising since this is a PuKurt story. Well I'm gay, so that pretty much explains it. Anyways, I'll continue the story if I get some kind of feedback, though I'm really not expecting anything.**

**Also, this story is actually inspired by "I'd Lie" by IceQueenRia who doesn't know I exist, but I love her stories.  
Oh, and** _Song lyrics are in italics _

**Chapter 1**

"Seriously babe, we've been together for a year. Are you sure you're not ready to go below the belt?" Puck asked, a slight pang of desperation in his voice. He couldn't even consider himself a sex shark anymore; if he did, he would've died a while ago.

"I'm sure, Noah." Kurt replied as he looked over his nails. To be quite honest, Kurt wasn't as sure as he sounded. They were alone in Puck's empty house, in his room, and he really wanted to go further with Noah. Because who wouldn't? Noah Puckerman had it going on in all the right places. Between his arrogant smirk, his chiseled abs, and his bad-boy haircut, it's no wonder that Puck has bedded half of the girls at McKinley High, plus their mothers. But that's precisely the reason Kurt was so against it. Not because he didn't want it, but because he knew there was no way he could measure up to the countless sexual partners Puck has had relations with. It was a deep insecurity of his that he kept completely to himself.

Puck wasn't aware of any of this, which is why he didn't give up.

"Princess, you know I'll make it good for you."

"The answer is no, Puckerman."

"I've already been tested, babe. I'm clean, if that's what you're worried about? I got the results in my truck if you don't believe me!"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I believe you. It's just…"

"What is it?" Puck inquired. "It's got to be something big if you're at a loss of words." He smirked.

"Ha-ha," Kurt replied, his voice laced with sarcasm. "Just…never mind. If you want to do something so badly, fine. I won't stop you anymore."

Puck was confused. It's not an often occasion that Kurt willingly gives in to anything. Though realizing this, it was quickly overshadowed by his favorite appendage. After only receiving a calloused hand for so long, little Puckerman Jr. was more than ready for some new kind of action.

Quickly, Puck covered Kurt's mouth with his own. He was hungry, though not for food. Kurt fell on top of the bed and Puck positioned himself between his legs. He was careful not to crush the smaller boy, though, and supported himself ups with his hands, all while ravishing Kurt's, now quite experienced, mouth.

Things became quickly heated as Noah kissed, sucked and licked all over his boyfriend's neck. Swiftly unbuttoning his boyfriend's shirt and throwing it to the side, he continued his little attack on Kurt's soft, white skin. Taking one of his own hands off the bed, he moved it to intertwine it with Kurt's; the clear color contrast was very noticeable. Moving his mouth southward from Kurt's neck to his chest, Noah's hands pulled on the buttons of Kurt's designer jeans. Kurt tensed and pulled Noah's face up to look him in the eyes.

"Wait…" Kurt began. "Not all the way, okay?"

"Okay." Noah agreed eager to get back to their activity.

He licked over Kurt's exposed stomach and made his way south and pulled off Kurt's jeans and underwear in one fast movement. Suddenly, he stilled. Staring him in the eye was Kurt's easily 9-inched, firmly erect member. Puck's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and he immediately stood up.

Kurt, confused by Noah's sudden actions, looked up. "What's wrong?"

"I c-can't, K-Kurt." Puck stuttered. "Fuck, it's too weird."

Kurt froze. "What are you talking about?" He asked, slowly.

"I thought I could do this. You're smoking but," Puck was more nervous than Kurt could ever recall seeing. "You're a dude. I just can't alright!"

"You have got to be kidding me." Kurt sneered. "I'm the one who wanted to keep my pants on and ignore your incessant bugging, but as soon as they come off, you can't take it. Some bad-ass you are, Puckerman."

"I'm still a bad-ass " the words flying out quickly to defend his honor, as Kurt was pulling his clothes back on. "Wait Princess, I still care about you."

"Just stop lying okay?" Kurt was beyond furious; he couldn't believe this was actually happening. He thought Noah actually cared about him. He couldn't have been more wrong. "I've got to go."

"Please babe, let me explain." Puck reached out to grab Kurt's arm, but Kurt shrugged him off.

"There's nothing you can say. You're straight and this whole relationship was just a sham." Kurt's voice was tight and quiet. He wasn't going to let Puck see him shed a tear. He just had to get out, and that's what he did.

Kurt ran across the yard to his Navigator across the street and got in. Starting the engine, he drove off, desperate to get out of there and go home. As nature would have it, it was raining, which coincidently matched Kurt's mood. The first tears began to fall as Kurt pictured Noah's smiling face.

_I see your face in my mind as I drive away_

He just didn't understand where things could have gone wrong. Although Puck was his first boyfriend, his relationship seemed perfectly happy and normal. How could Noah, who despite his bad-ass exterior, act so lovingly to him, only to turn around and get put off by the fact Kurt's a boy? They were together for a year, for goodness sake! Why had he let it go on for so long if he knew that he couldn't get physical with another boy? Maybe this was all some sort of elaborate prank from his former bully, but there's no way that Puck would have kept up this charade for a year's time. Especially not after all the shit he got for being with Kurt. It just didn't make sense.

* * *

Back at the Puckerman household, Puck is sitting on his bed, staring at the wall. Why did he freeze up? Noah was upset. There's no way that a sex god like him could freeze up at the chance of doing something sex driven with the insanely hot, Kurt Hummel. His mind was a swirling tornado of thoughts. Did he love Kurt? The first answer that popped into his head was 'yes'. Why else would he have dated him for an entire year and remained faithful and abstinent that entire time if he didn't? It just didn't make sense why he panicked. Either way, he didn't want this relationship to end.

_'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way_

* * *

Kurt entered the Hudson-Hummel household and headed straight towards his room, causing his Dad to look up in curiosity. Kurt was never so tactless to not offer some sort of acknowledgement. Even on the days Kurt would come home smelling like garbage, he would still muster a smile for Burt and greet him. Something must be terribly wrong.

As soon as Kurt entered his room, he crashed onto his bed. He opted to skip his skin care nighttime ritual just this once in favor of sulking on his bed. He really shouldn't be all that surprised. Puckerman is the notorious womanizer of McKinley High, key word: woman. Kurt's not a girl, despite the feminine features. Plus, Noah's only human. He's allowed to make mistakes, even if that mistake is wasting a year of Kurt Hummel's life. Though can you really call it wasting, when one has enjoyed it so much?

Maybe it was real, but Noah just changed his mind. That must be it. Coming to that conclusion didn't relieve Kurt of any of his pain. He couldn't help but sob at the fact that Noah Puckerman was gone. It's killing him and there's nothing he could do about it. Noah's straight. Even after all this time.

_People are people and sometimes we change our minds_

_But it's killing me to see you go after all this time_


	2. Chapter 2

******Disclaimer- I do not own Glee or any songs mentioned.**

******So here's chapter 2. I'm just going to say sorry in advance if this chapter is kind of confusing or if the characters seem a little OOC. It was completely unintentional. This chapter was just not wanting to come out right, but hopefully it's still good enough for your guys' taste. :)**

******By the way, thanks for the reviews, alerts, and favorites! They mean a lot to me.**

_Song Lyrics are in italics _

One of the songs in this chapter is _"Ashes and Wine" by A Fine Frenzy. _I absolutely love that song!

**A few changes to canon.  
Also, Quinn cheated on Finn with Puck, but she didn't get pregnant. I guess you can say that Puck and Kurt first got together towards the end of season one, but Mercedes never dated Puck. Puck never stopped throwing Kurt in the dumpster, even after joining Glee Club.**

**Chapter 2**

_Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm_

_Mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm_

Kurt woke up the next morning feeling extra tired. He probably only got about 3 hours of sleep, if that. The thoughts of everything that happened yesterday hit him with full force. Between the make out session, to Noah basically saying he's straight, to running out of that house, he has never been so embarrassed and hurt in his entire life, which is saying a lot considering the countless slushy facials, dumpster tosses, and locker shoves.

Escaping to his bathroom for a well needed hot shower, he turned on his stereo to one of his favorite songs to listen to when feeling depressed and sung along with it.

_Don't know what to do anymore  
I lost the only love worth fighting for  
I'll drown in my tear storming sea  
That would show you, that would make you hurt like me  
All the same  
I don't want a mudslinging game  
It's such a shame  
To let you walk away._

Kurt felt the song somehow fit his situation. He knew he was being a little melodramatic, considering the fact that Noah was his first love and everything, to compare him to the "_only love worth fighting for". _He just couldn't help but be affected by this. Heart break was agonizing pain. He'd prefer a hundred dumpster tosses and slushy facials over this constricted chest pain. There's nothing he could do about it. It was time to begin the healing process and what better way to do that than letting all his tears out with some sad music?

_Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie,_

* * *

Noah was just waking up. He's got a massive headache after drowning his regret in alcohol last night. He couldn't process what happened and it just irritated him not knowing what to do. Naturally, alcohol is the easiest thought suppressant. He contemplated not going to school, but he knew he needed to go to sort things out with Kurt. He owed him some kind of explanation for his odd behavior. But did he even have an explanation? Somehow saying he had an "off night" didn't seem to justify his actions. He was so fucked.

_It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see._

* * *

Kurt Hummel strode into McKinley, holding his head up with such pride. He's a master at hiding his emotions, his mask almost impenetrable. He arrived at his locker, lost in thought. The only person he could ever really let his walls down with was Noah, but look where that got him? He wasn't even that open with his best friend, Mercedes, though that was kind of expected after how she acted towards his relationship.

* * *

***Flashback*About a year ago***

_Mercedes dragged Kurt into an empty classroom the moment she saw he was alone. She didn't need anyone interrupting._

"_Sit the hell down, white boy." Mercedes demanded. She was exasperated. What the hell was going on in her best friend's mind?_

"_What is it?" Kurt deadpanned. He knew this was coming, but he thought it might be smarter to act ignorant so that Mercedes can let out all her frustrations. _

"_You know damn well what it is. What is going on in your head, boy? Are you really that lonely to go with PUCK of all people? Not only that, but I had to find out about your relationship from Rachel! You know that girl cannot stop talking once she gets going!"_

"_What do you want me to say? I really like him and have for a while now. One thing led to another, and now we're dating. Why can't you just be happy for me?"_

"_O hell to the no! You weren't saying you liked him yesterday when he was tossing you in the dumpster. You know, like he does every day? I'm your best friend and I've only got your best interest at heart. But this is Puck we're talking about! He's straighter than a freaking pole. There's no way that he could be genuinely interested in you. Puckerman is messing with your head! This must be his new way of making your life a living hell!"_

"_Wow Mercedes. Thanks for enlightening me about my own repulsiveness. It's not like I'm reminded of that every single day of my life when I'm insulted by those mindless Neanderthals our school calls 'jocks'." His tone was icy. Mercedes just now realized her mistake. _

"_Baby boy, you know that's not what I meant. All I'm saying is that you need to open your eyes. You hate Puck as much as I do."_

"_Correction: I hat__ed__ Puck, emphasis on the –ed." He doesn't know when or how it happened but, somehow, his view of Noah Puckerman changed. He wasn't the mindless Neanderthal 'puck' anymore. He was the surprisingly respectful and kindhearted 'Noah' now. He wasn't going to let Mercedes get him down. He was honestly happy now. If she couldn't see that, then she didn't deserve to be in his life anymore._

_It killed him to say as much. "If you can't accept my new-found romance, then maybe we shouldn't be best friends."_

_Mercedes face fell. She couldn't believe she was hearing this. "You…c-can't be serious, Kurt. After all we've been through, you're going to just drop me like that? Over a __**boy**__?"_

"_If that means keeping my relationship, then yes; we can't be friends if you can't accept this. I really like him, Mercedes. You of all people should just be happy for me." Kurt was practically begging her to see reason. He didn't want to lose his best friend, but what else could he do?_

"_He's already changing you, Kurt." Her eyes started to water. "Just don't come to me when this all blows up in your face."_

_With that, she was gone._

***End Flashback***

* * *

In a way, maybe Mercedes was right. This did blow up in Kurt's face. Not that he was going to let her know it. He had way too much pride for that.

Since that day, Kurt's best friend was Rachel. Shocking? Of course, but she was the only one to completely support his relationship with Noah from the get go. Plus, Kurt could never deny the drastic similarities between him and the fashionably challenged soprano. Both their final destinies pointed towards the Broadway stage in New York. That alone was enough to permit their friendship.

Speaking of Ms. Berry, she was quick to meet Kurt.

"What's wrong?" Rachel asked. Kurt was looking paler than usual; not even his moisturizing routine could fix his sunken face.

"Nothing, Rachel." Kurt answered. He was really hoping to keep this embarrassment to himself, but that didn't look like it was going to happen.

"Kurt, you're my best gay. You know you can trust me with anything."

"I'd rather keep this to myself." Rachel wasn't the best at keeping secrets. Although she had good intentions, almost anything private she was supposed to keep to herself exploded out in the most dramatic way possible.

However, Rachel wasn't one to give up so easily. "You look depressed, Kurt. Want me to give you my therapist's number? He's greatly helped both of my two gay dads. He can help you too!"

"Rachel," Kurt began, his voice loud enough to gather the surrounding student's attention. "Enough is enough. I said no. Leave me alone." With that, Kurt stormed off leaving a stupefied Rachel behind.

As Kurt fumed down the hall and turned the corner, something caught his eye on the opposite side of the hallway: a Mohawk and a Letterman jacket. Suddenly, Kurt went numb. Blue-green eyes made contact with chocolate-brown ones. Time slowed down. The world could have ended right there, and neither of the two boys would have noticed; they were lost in each other's eyes.

Rachel caught up with Kurt, insistent on finding out what's wrong. She looked up at Kurt in wonder at his sudden stunned physique. Looking down the hall at what Kurt was staring at, she immediately understood. Noah and Kurt were having complications. Her heart clenched at the thought. Nobody would ever say so, but Rachel Berry was very observant. She was also psychic, well at least she believed she was. Mixing those two gifts together gave Rachel a fantastic ability, the ability to see true love. And what Noah and Kurt had, was true love. She knew this the moment they first got together, solidifying her and Kurt's friendship, and this heartfelt look only proved her opinion right. It'll be a tragedy if what they have ends. She knew for a fact that Kurt would be broken, reverting to his earlier state of shutting everyone out.

_Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down,_

* * *

Noah couldn't handle this stare-down and dropped his gaze. It was screwing with his head and making him feel worse than he already did.

He cared about Kurt; that was undeniable. Twenty-four hours ago, Puck believed he was unconditionally and completely in love with Kurt. He was his princess; he never felt anything similar, not even for his best friend's girl. What changed? He flipped out. He couldn't handle another guy's dick, even if that dick was as pretty as Kurt's. Fuck, why was this so hard? Was he having regrets? Yes. The only question was whether he was having regrets over freezing up or having regrets over his relationship with Kurt.

Puck raged off. He shoved a nearby freshman into the lockers, something he hadn't done since he started dating Kurt. He blinked away his unshed tears and took off in the direction of the locker room, away from Kurt.

_Now I don't know what to be without you around._


End file.
